Mid 2012 Master Index! Lots And Lots Of Cool Stuff!

Posted: May 31, 2012 in Uncategorized

Lots and lots of stuff, in an updated list provided for those who want to go straight to the goodies! Approaching 30 “Remake Chronicles” Essays alone, with more to come!

Remake Chronicles Essays

TRUE GRIT: The Movie Star Versus The Actor

Matinee On the Bounty: Or, That’s Not Very Christian

Wielding Prop Spears Against Real Wolves: The Two Versions of TO BE OR NOT TO BE

Three Mutes, Three Mad Sculptors, One Paddle-Ball Man and Three Houses of Wax

One Pothole Away From Death: Two Versions of THE WAGES OF FEAR

The Two Troubled Commutes Of Ted Stryker

Counting the Chips at CASINO ROYALE

PSYCHO: A Remake That Was Just Plain Crazy

Remakes For Shmucks: Two Versions of THE DINNER GAME

Yeah, That Remake’s All Messed Up: Three Versions of NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD

Murders Gone Messy: Two Versions of BLOOD SIMPLE

Three Upside-Down Ships: God And THE POSEIDON ADVENTURE

When Your Baby Has A Baby: The Father Of the Bride Movies

Four Deadbeat Dads: The Questionable Parenting Skills of the Doctors Frankenstein

Twenty-Four Angry Men

Just Get Me To The Church Alive: Two Versions of SEVEN CHANCES

Seymour Krelboyne’s Two Shifts at THE LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS

When CAPTAIN AMERICA Blows His Mighty Chunks

Monkey See, Monkey Two: CONQUEST and RISE of THE PLANET OF THE APES

Twenty Two Musketeers (Part One): The Ritzes Putting On You

Twenty Two MUSKETEERS (Part Two): Wherefore Art Thou, Definitive?

THE MALTESE FALCON and The Stuff That Dreams Aren’t Made Of

Two Visits to Willy Wonka’s CHOCOLATE FACTORY

MR. SMITH and BILLY JACK go to WASHINGTON

Two Dangerous Tattooed Women

FRIGHT NIGHT: The Two Redemptions Of Peter Vincent

SAMURAI, Gunfighters, Starships, Insects, and AMIGOS

The Two Men Who KNEW TOO MUCH

The Good, The Bad, The Ugly, The Weird

Assorted Other Film Essays

The Fattening Of APOCALYPSE NOW

The “Fraser”

CITY HEAT

Remake These!

Scenes That Shouldn’t Let the Door Kick Them In the Ass On the Way Out # 1: The Computer Virus

The Problem With THE NEXT THREE DAYS

Remake This #2

Great Moments In Miscasting # 1

When Sequels Fail #1: ENSIGN PULVER

Saying The Right Thing

On Taking Your Kids To The Movies

My Favorite Piece of Movie Trivia Ever. Ever.

How To Avoid Assholes At The Movies

Old Rose (from James Cameron’s TITANIC) was Stupid and Evil

Cosmic Lameness

More Cosmic Lameness: SARAH LANDON

Something I Felt I Just Had To Rant About

Questions About CASABLANCA

MILK vs. SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE

 DOWNFALL

Great-Ish Movies: RUNAWAY TRAIN

There’s No Need To Atone

The Problem With THE RIVER

Don’t Mess With THE QUEEN

 An Awful Clunk: Sidney Poitier and Bobby Darin in PRESSURE POINT

Lucky McKee’s THE WOMAN

What’s Wrong With THE TOURIST

Another Frozen Cow: THE RARE BREED

RESURRECT DEAD?

VAN HELSING

MacKENNA’S GOLD

 

Fiction
“Curse of the Phlegmpire,” by Adam-Troy Castro

“After the Zombies Passed,” by Judi B. Castro and Chris Negelein

Assorted Cool Other Stuff

Ten Reasons

They Actually Exist (My encounter with two very familiar characters)

The Man Who Didn’t Lie To The Cops 

“I Just Sold A Novel!”

“A Cure For The Blues,” by Mark Twain At Last! The Batman and Robin Murder Mystery — Solved!

Morty: A Memoir

Way To Go…Morons!

Secret Sequels

On Saying “No” To Learned Eminences

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